Gasp! Why don’t my apples taste like your pears? I mean – we are all fruit aren’t we?
After spending some time with a few of the moms in my life this past weekend, I was feeling “less than”. By less than I mean – I felt like I wasn’t doing enough of something. Do you know what I mean? I found myself planning on buying new toys, trying to get DJ books that are more educational and cooking more food from scratch. Basically making A LOT more effort in the baby department. Yesterday afternoon Ian said to me “Love, you are enough – all this is great, but without it you are still doing enough.”
My husband is great right? He is. I needed to hear that. It made me however just question myself, why am I not enough for me? Now after I wrote about mom judgement and confessing that I am myself also guilty of judging other moms by my own standards. Thinking less of them because my own decisions were somehow different and better for us or me as a family you would think that I would know better than in any way or form to NOT compare myself to other moms. BUT I thought about it a lot. It made my head hurt actually.
I surround myself with moms whom I love and admire so from time to time I will feel like I should be bettering an aspect of my own parenting whilst learning from another mom. It’s something that is to be expected and understood. Right? Or is it? Am I comparing myself to better myself? It didn’t feel like it. It kinda feels like it’s only opposite ends of the spectrum – either I love what another mom is doing so much that I beat myself up about not doing it myself OR I’m sitting there thinking hmmm I’m doing it better than you so therefore you must be wrong. #judging
Then I found this quote and it just spoke to my being.
The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our “behind the scenes” with everyone else’s highlight reels. – Steven Furtick
It doesn’t get better than that – right? With social media being what it is, it is just soooo easy to be looking around and just thinking how am I doing it all sooooo wrong? How is it that these other picture perfect moms are getting it so right. Just remember that it’s a highlight reel. I’m not too bad with social media usually. But this past weekend really had the mom guilt hovering over me like a dark cloud.
Instead I needed to remind myself – I’m doing it right for me. I’m doing what works for us. I’m doing it because it is the best I have to give right now. AND THAT IS OK! It is okay.
It’s okay. Get it Vee? It’s okay.
These are things that I want to remember next time I start being crazy and feeling inadequate next to people that I know are not trying to make me feel inadequate.
There are so many aspects to this mom thing and I am having so much fun delving into all of them in the lead up to Mother’s Day, if you missed any – here they are again…The Fomo Factor, Why I love being a mom, and how I am rocking motherhood.
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In the meantime – do you compare yourself to others? How do you keep yourself in check?