In my last post about why we still co-sleep at 2, I briefly touched on the fact that I am ready to wean Daniel. What I actually meant to say was – “I am so sick of breastfeeding now, and I just want all my body parts for myself.” I loved breastfeeding (most of the time), but after 18months I became a little resentful. Not toward my beloved of course, but he would wake up just for comfort.. because he could. It drove me insane. Not to mention inappropriately grabbing my boobs and asking in his unique way at the most inopportune times for a bit of HIS tieties. I was however… afraid of toddler weaning!
Fear of Toddler Weaning…
Maybe I was a little bit irrational, but my child is a little stubborn. Sweet, cute and so intelligent but oh so stubborn. Strong-willed and all the pretty words you can think of in place of difficult. He also loves his “tietie”, like a lot. Sometimes I thought he loved his tietie more than food, drinks and sometimes even sweets. It was insane! Around 18 months though, we decided it might be time to start implementing some boundaries with him having a full mouth of teeth and all. My fear was still evident, but I figured when the time was right it would be easier… secretly holding thumbs it was before I enrolled him for pre-primary.
Starting off slow…
We started the process by curbing his enthusiasm at certain places, first I stopped feeding when we were out and I would tell him when we got home then he could have. After, I stopped feeding during the day completely. This was probably over the course of a few months, and no, it was not easy. I gave in a lot to keep the peace, and my sanity! And after it all, I think the key really is to be consistent. Calm and consistent.
When we had the day feeding out, I began to have a little more hope. In the evenings while he would feed I would offer him a warm bottle of milk. Sometimes he took it, sometimes he didn’t. That was okay – there was no pressure. It was just an offer.
After a while, I realised it wasn’t so much about the milk as it was about the comfort. The “we” time he would have during his feeds, this realisation really made a huge difference to the way I behaved going forward. I would come home and sit with him on the same couch we used to feed and just chat or watch TV with him for the 10minutes where he previously had fed. Distracting him with offers of snacks, toys and games if he asked for a sip.
Then I got really sick!
I wouldn’t call myself healthy but I don’t often get sick. The last time, however, I got really sick. It kind of felt a bit like my husband would describe his cold/flu.. but just literally! Sick like I have never been before. I was down and out, and functioning normally was out of the questions, I just could not. Somewhere in the confusion I fell asleep on the couch and Ian took over, he did it all including the night time wakes. Without. The. Boob.
This became night 1, thereafter we just thought if you could survive one night why not try a few more. We haven’t looked back since he was a little obsessive at first but it has since died down. He would tell me that it was his “tieties” ALL the time. Then he would lift my top look at them laugh, or touch them and laugh. Lay on them, kiss them, smell them – very weird luckily it died out.
It’s been just under 3 weeks and he’s not asking anymore. He does, however, lay with me quite a bit, so definitely missing the time for “us”. However – SUCCESS! After 2 years – I have finally got my boobs back!
In the Meantime – Did you go through toddler weaning? How did you do it? Let me know in the comments.